Thursday, July 23, 2009

10 Things YOU Can Do To Make Oski's Life Even Miserabler

What is that? Not enough lists on this blog, you say? Well then.

I was thinking about thinking about posting this on Protrade, but I figured it would be absolutely ridiculous to think of such a thing. After all, I've got a reputation to maintain, losers. If I'm ever going to revert to illitericism, I'm obviously starting on this page.

1. Post about how PT is going down the tubes, and how you'll be dancing on Oski's grave once Jeff Ma finishes him off. This was the most obvious one, so I decided to get it out of the way before continuing. Fun Fact: Oski avoids any PMs you send him since he's been getting so many death threats lately.

2. Make a multiple account entitled "multipleaccount". There was only one genius on that site brilliant enough to do that, so cheerz t'him.

3. Threaten to retire and then don't. Oski wants some of you gone *cough, cough* Knepp *cough*.

4. SHORT GOLF!!!!! I don't know why, it just seemed appropriate.

5. Buy all the shorts and short all the buys with your multiple accounts so that Oski gets complaints about broken algorithms.

6. Make more multiple accounts to accomplish #5.

7. Skip numbers in lists because you are lazy, so that Oski is confused, and can't focus on the billions of other problems you've created for him. I love Oski with all my heart, which is why the number "seven" in this post comes right after the number "six".

8. Make "discussion" posts. I don't know why people think it makes his job any easier. Hey Oski! We should make auctions where you have to bid the least amount of money, so that I'll get an easy $25 dollar gift card with my lucky number $1.23! Hey Oski! we should terminate all users of! Hey Oski! Could we maybe have a karaoke night for users with 1M and Under?

9. Summon Mike Kerns via Facebook. For every complaint you send to Kerns, Kerns will verbally abuse Oski over the internet, for not caring enough.

10. Blame Oski for everything that goes wrong in your life. Protrade is no longer fun for me. Darn you, Oski! My computer froze right as I was trying to snatch IPOs! Darn you, Oski! MY CAT JUST DIED OF STARVATION! DARN YOU, OSKI!!!!!!!!

Well, I hope you enjoyed. Stay tuned for the 10 Million Things You can Do To Make Jeff Ma Not Care.


  1. "Haha, that would be pretty damn silly. Keep up the clowning sense of humor. Me and Stacey love it."

    Oski's response to me asking if I could add PROTRADE in front of my name. He loves me.

  2. Who is Oski? What is Protrade? I'm never coming back.


  3. Curses. I scared off yet another potential viewer of this blog. Oh no!

  4. Ben Roethlisberger raped me.

  5. I haven't posted a comment here...