Saturday, August 22, 2009

What's the difference between the WNBA and Little League Baseball?

Ground Rules: No one likes the WNBA.

But the more and more I bash little league baseball, the more dirty looks I get. What is the difference?

We're talking about sports being played poorly due to physical liabilities. One due to the physical weakness of women, the other due to subpar coordination during child development.

And why do my co-workers like watching children cry? I almost want to call protective services. They may be playing out a little league conquest at the dinner table, complete with irreparable psychological damage due to the outcome of a meaningless baseball game. Remember who won the 1986 World Series? Of course you do. Remember who won the 2008 Little League World Series? If you do, stop reading.

Here's the part of the post where you're thinking "He must've had a bad experience with Little League and he's just bitter." Well, yes and no. I hated Little League, but I knew I would hate it going in. It was pretty much a "let's get this over with" hate and not a "how many epithets can my dad shout at the other team while they bat and where is his shirt" hate. Hey kids, losing this game you play so poorly makes all the difference in the way your parents view you. Oh, national television too. Now go out there and shit your pants.

So when someone bashes the WNBA, while extolling the virtues of little league baseball in the same breath, see if you can get them fired for having snuff films on their hard drive.

The Less You Know *asteroid*

7 comments:

  1. The main difference is that the WNBA isn't played poorly.

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  2. The Little League World Series has a lot more tension to me than the WNBA. The WNBA has a bunch of women missing lay-ups and shooting poorly, since they lack the range in athleticism you see in the NBA to create exciting plays.

    In the LLWS, outside of the human drama aspects, you still have the best players for that age playing against one another. Yeah, they're just little kids, but there are still tense, watchable moments, like Mexico working itself out of a bases loaded jam today against Canada.

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  3. They both suck diseased donkey balls.

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  4. "The main difference is that the WNBA isn't played poorly"

    Compared to the NBA it is, which is unfair..........I guess.

    Are you John Wooden?

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  5. "like Mexico working itself out of a bases loaded jam today against Canada."

    That wasn't skill, Canada got screwed. How would you feel if you got the bases loaded and then Kenny comes up to bat? Automatic out.

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  6. Humans love drama. Kids are dramatic and cute. You're neither.

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